You're in Luck -- Kevin Maher's new AMC "Sci-Fi Scanner" is up!

Kevin Maher's latest hilarious offering on the AMC site is a panel discussion of Harry Potter versus "The Golden Compass."

In case the costume fools you, that's me -- the Reader -- via satellite. And yes, that is the mighty Paul Herbig as the Lord of the Rings Fan.

It’s Dick Cheney – And He’s Armed!

Ever since the Poughkeepsie Journal reported this weekend that Vice President Dick Cheney will go hunting at the Clove Valley Rod & Gun Club, the humor’s been flying like buckshot in LaGrangeville, New York.

“The same old jokes are going around,” says Matt Dwyer, who is in charge of clipping bird wings for the gun club. “You know, ‘let’s hope his aim is better now than when he was saying there was an al Qaida-Saddam link’ and ‘I bet the birds know what Valerie Plame felt like.’ Just good-natured stuff like that.’

While some area residents complain about road closings and traffic delays, others say he should be left alone to enjoy some well-deserved R&R and get a taste of what it will be like when he retires to private life to enjoy his deferred Halliburton compensation full-time.

But there are a few class clowns who can’t resist having a little good-natured fun about Cheney’s hunting abilities.

“I’m no Jay Leno,” says one long-time Dutchess County resident. “The man’s here to commune with nature and shoot at it, so we won’t be making with the gags about his aim in the past – like why he’s underfunding the CIA in favor of the NSA. Or the liberties he’s taken with the Constitution.”

oh, how Merle wished he knew what to do about the itchy new sweater; he rubbed the magical lamp -- and behold! -- Jebez, the enchanted moth, appeared

Which of these were Snoop Dogg's again?

drizzle
fizzle
guzzle
razzle-dazzle
muzzle
nozzle
puzzle
pizzle

CURRENTLY ON THE BAT-DRAWING BOARD

spellchecker still picking up "bat-erang"


awl -- new hole in the utility belt (Robin stay out of good tool box)


update Justice League speed dial numbers for Green Lantern
tell Kyle, Hal, Guy, Jon, Alan -- NOBODY is going in top five


remove test gyrostabilization chip from Cuisinart


for WGTM's on-air limerick contest Friday:
There was was a man called The Penguin
A criminal vicious, yet sanguine
Believe it or not
He's Oswald Cobblepot
And his criminal mind (something something)


Call university geneologist re: possible relation to Mad Anthony Wayne


add real fruit juice to batsicle prototype
batsicle too similar-sounding to batcycle?
batpops?


batrollups?


letter to editor Gotham Gazette, correct web site, search for:
Bat-Man
BatMan
Bat Man


write Gotham Dept of Buildings

1. lots of abandoned warehouses and former factories, perfect villain lairs
2. unsafe parapets
   

Meeting with Comm Gordon -- problems with Bat-Signal / movie premieres


schedule follow-up appt Dr. Goldberg re: batsicles (batstes)


ALFRED DO NOT ERASE! ******* ALFRED DO NOT ERASE!

Marcel Marceau (1923-2007), Bip (1947-2007)

He went quietly.

He looks like he's sleeping. With his elbow propped up on a mantel.

Now he's walking against the dirt.

And after all that time trying to escape from a box, too.

Other Perfectly Good Names MoveOn.org Can Use in the Future When Referring to General Petraeus

General Slayus

General Mywayus

General Dismayus

General Pompeiius

General Threeseconddelayus

General Oyveyus

General Blueandgrayus

General RachelRayus

General Onomatopoeias

General Doubtthathesgayus

General ComeonandrockmeAmadeus