Dude, it’s official -- Russian President Vladimir Putin is having a mid-life crisis as bad as your Dad’s or something.

Remember when your Dad started washing the car five times a week when those college girls moved in?

Ever since Putin went on vacation in Siberia, he hasn’t had his shirt on once.

All of a sudden they get all, “You shouldn’t be carrying those heavy groceries.” Or else, “Ooh, let me bait your hook for you.”

Also? Your Dad’s new car is nothing next to Putin’s plane with the solid-gold sink and the solid-gold shower. Anyway they look solid gold.

Your Dad got new shades and Putin got some.

Your Dad goes to Miami, Putin goes to the North Pole.

Acting like they discovered it.

Putin got a dog and some new gym equipment.
Somewhere Putin’s wife was probably saying the same thing as your mom.
“Maybe it’s good for him. It’s good for his heart cholesterol” or something.

Mostly what it means is you’re walking that dog and shoveling the minefield.
Your Dad got a new guitar – a Les Paul. Don’t worry. Putin’s got his axe also.
Maybe they would have more time to learn how to play if they weren’t busy sticking their head in the picture next to the girls every time.

But in real life, he’s just another boring business guy.

Seriously? I’m not even trying to be harsh, but that could be your Dad that Putin’s talking to right there except your Dad would be wearing his baseball cap.

No offense, Dude, but if that was my Dad?

I would tell him stay out of Siberia.

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